The Cult of Abundance, Goal Autoimmune Disorder, & Abundance 2.0
I have a legitimate introduction coming your way. Before I get to that, I hope you’ll to watch the vomit-inducing video below, produced by The Secret’s author.
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Highlights from the Video:
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OK, done? Cool. We’ll be getting back to this video later. In the meantime, let’s talk about how . . .
Goals Can be Our Worst Enemies
You know how it goes. Back in the day you were excited about your goal.
You made a vision board and a goal movie, and have a visual mantra. Everything seemed fine and dandy until one day a particular goal started owning you. You started getting less sleep, neglecting your family, living an unbalanced life, etc. for the sake of your goals. Or maybe you didn’t do any of these things. Maybe you were still living in a healthy manner, but just felt like a screw-up because you had failed to achieve a publically-declared goal, or a goal carefully put to paper. A goal that was supposed to empower you made you feel like a loser, it became a little tyrant running your life. All this really has everything to do with the screwed up tactics of…
The Goal Goblin
So often we fail to find true freedom after liberating ourselves from repressive jobs, parents, relationships, and work environments. Once external factors no longer tie us down, it becomes easy to become our own tyrant bosses, our own goal taskmasters; we free ourselves of unreasonable/unsustainable external demands, only to be left with self-imposed anxieties and demands. We make what seem to be incredible sacrifices to remove ourselves from restrictive conventional situations, and damn it, after all that sacrifice, it better result in something breathtakingly amazing. So we start setting unrealistic and ego-driven goals (as opposed to the unreasonable authentic goals that bring us alive and cause us to wreak havoc on the world in beautiful ways).
What happens is that liberation leaves in its wake a post-liberation tyrant-shaped hole. That tyrant wants us to do whatever it takes to achieve our goals. We start abusing ourselves, giving ourselves flack for failing to meet unreasonable deadlines, leveraging power dynamics to twist our own arms, and forcing ourselves to work unreasonable hours. Same crap, different prick (you). And if that goal goblin or tyrant-in-the-head stays around long enough, you’ll have a full blown case of…
Goal Autoimmune Disorder
In a world where the signal of our authentic wants is obscured by the noise of external “shoulds,” goals are meant to remind us of what we want when we really know what we want. Goals are useful for making us immune to the waves of external forces threatening to push of off course.
Goals should keep us anchored to our own realities. They’re tools meant to make things better, and for this reason we should also be willing to change them as frequently as necessary frequently. If our goals are making things worse, then we probably don’t have the whole goal thing in perspective. I’ve been there. It sucks.
The problem is that all too often we’ve turned our goals into little cult objects. We’ve allowed our goals to rule our lives and alienate us. We’ve been taught to be tenacious at all costs and to will our goals into existence. We are taught that we can have whatever we want if we just work hard enough.
Sorry, but we can’t have everything you want. We can have a lot. We can probably become millionaires and live fabulously and be wildly successful.
But we can’t have everything we want (contrary to what so many of the law of attraction people tell us). Two year olds haven’t learned this yet. Adults should have this part handled by now.
So what is goal autoimmune disorder? It’s when the goals that were supposed to liberate us start to kicking us in the groin, steering us off path, and demanding more than we should ever give.
Here are some symptoms of goal autoimmune disorder…
- You can’t see the forest for your goals
- You’ve become top heavy on superego
- You make unhealthy sacrifices and don’t let up after working harder and harder on your goal (sacrificing more and more) with little or no traction
- You start putting goals above family, friends, loved ones, and your mental and physical health
- You have a succeed-at-all-costs (ALL COSTS!) attitude
- Your goals become your worst enemies
Somewhat related to goal autoimmune disorder is . . .
The Cult of Abundance
Abundance can be a beautiful idea, but it also has an ugly side. Check out this video:
Like the video at the beginning, it makes me want to puke.
I mean, having a lot of nice stuff is great. But more riches than King Solomon’s mines? Four very expensive cars, a racing boat, a private jet, two homes, and whatever else that video talked about? Dude, that’s not abundance, that’s hubris. That’s some crazy nutjob ego stuff. Seriously, on an ordered list of important things in life, having a private jet is probably hovering around five-thousand, eight-hundred, and forty-two.
Can you imagine what your ecological footprint would be if you had all that? People give me flack about the whole virtual assistant thing not being sustainable, but these videos?
This whole abundance thing that claims we can have whatever we want has simply gone too far. I’d like to see it replaced with . . .
Abundance 2.0
Abundance 2.0 is sustainable abundance. It’s fair-trade abundance. It’s the kind of abundance that doesn’t produce megalomaniacs (or megalomaniacism).
Abundance 2.0 means that you live a radically authentic life, be radically true to yourself, get paid for being you, quit the things you need to quit, and still have enough materials possessions to be happy and make your family happy. Abundance 2.0 is what happens when your life is so great that the private jet just isn’t necessary.
Note: I’m not advocating asceticism, or saying that you need to deny yourself all material possessions and live a celibate life in the woods. Furthermore, I entirely embrace the notion that you might make millions as a side-effect of living a beautiful and authentic life. I’m cool with that. I do, however, believe that when you’ve come alive, you’ll be fine with . . .
The Beautiful Bare Minimum
When you know what time it is, when you’ve come alive, when you’ve found that goal that galvanizes you (or it’s found you), then that private jet probably won’t matter so much. When you’ve found something that’s truly important, the sacrifices just won’t seem like sacrifices. The truth is that we can have a couple of nice things, like a sweet computer or a new car, and still live on very little (if necessary) if we ditch cable and don’t eat out all the time, and stop paying $5 per beer when we go out with friends. We can deal. In fact we can more than deal… we can live beautifully.
To ensure that a private jet’s is in your future, subscribe to The Growing Life today.
Vered said,
Wrote on April 18, 2008 @ 2:20 pm
I have read in several places lately that it is actually becoming trendy now to live a simpler life, which means buying (and as a result owning and maintaining) LESS stuff. I guess some people just haven’t heard about it yet…
Jonathan from JonathanMead.com said,
Wrote on April 18, 2008 @ 2:25 pm
This is something I’ve been realizing more and more lately.
The more I gain, the more I realize I can live without what I have. As you said, asceticism isn’t any more the answer than becoming and materialistic ego maniac.
The key is appreciating things for what they are, but not making them part of your identity.
Clay Collins said,
Wrote on April 18, 2008 @ 2:30 pm
@Jonathan: Totally agree. And it goes beyond materials possessions. In my view too many people are letting their goals roast them alive.
@Vered: Yeah, less is the new more. People are still slaves to $$$, but at least they have less stuff. It’s a good first step.
Tom Stine said,
Wrote on April 18, 2008 @ 2:33 pm
Come on, Clay. Spiritual materialism is the new spirituality. Get with the program. You can manifest it all! :-D
Yeah, I agree with you, Clay. I’m cool with the Secret these days, because it really can show a lot of people that they are not victims of life. You don’t have to live life always stressed to the max about money. Good message. But is it just me, or did many of the people in the Secret feel like used car salesmen?
To my way of thinking, Abundance 2.0 is to live in harmony with life, to live in the flow of life. The way I see it, the Universe is an abundant place. A famous spiritual dude observed that God provides for the lilies of the fields. We can have a life of harmony, of flow, of enjoying life free of material want AND excess. That’s Abundance 2.0.
We think a like, my friend. We certainly do.
Daniel Richard | Winning Everyone said,
Wrote on April 18, 2008 @ 3:20 pm
Gosh Clay! That header picture looks scary on its own, not to mention that 2nd video clip.
I learned a new word from you - Hubris.
Thanks for sharing this post. :)
Adam King said,
Wrote on April 18, 2008 @ 7:21 pm
Dude, you have to be reading my mind! If ever there was a case to prove synchronization, your last two posts are the icing on the cake! This “Goal Goblin” is certainly the creature that plagues me at the moment. I have sacrificed too much for accomplishment’s sake and what has it got me? Enslavement to the process of achieving the goals. Liberation and freedom are unwillingly sacrificed in favor of self imposed slavery. This is certainly not who I am nor who I should be. This is not authentic living. This isn’t even living. Clay, once again, I thank you.
Evelyn Lim said,
Wrote on April 18, 2008 @ 9:52 pm
Thanks for sharing this post, Clay!
This article has a lot of sense to me. In fact, it captured the essence of my downfall in the past few years, prior to realising what is wrong with becoming too attached with my goals. In a way, I’m glad it happened because without having gone through some of my darkest moments, I would not have sought inner healing so intensely.
I’ve also wrestled with the issue about abundance versus simplicity and have come to the same conclusion, such as yours. Clearly, abundance affords us more options to lead the life we want.
Love and light,
Evelyn
@Stephen | Productivity in Context said,
Wrote on April 19, 2008 @ 6:53 am
Nice one Clay, There is definitely a problem with the modern definition of abundance. Alex Shalman’s “Happiness Project” provided some wonderful examples of perspective and true abundance. Read my contribution to it here.
Clay, you should “do” this interview project, I’d love to see your answers to those questions.
Cameron Schaefer said,
Wrote on April 19, 2008 @ 10:35 am
Clay,
This is wonderful. I am so glad that someone else is finally raising a flag about all this abundance and law of attraction stuff. I wrote a post a little while back called, “Are Your Goals Destroying You?” about how goals are meant to be a means, not the ends in themselves.
I realized after spending some excessive time on a few goals that there must be definite priorities…some goals have to come first before others. How do I decide this? I ask, “In what areas am I irreplaceable?” For me this includes being a husband, father and worshiper. So these areas always come before any other goals.
Anyway, I’m so glad you wrote this, I’m becoming a very big fan of this blog, keep it up!
Cameron
Torley said,
Wrote on April 19, 2008 @ 11:15 am
I think “The Secret” is a crock of useless crap, containing obvious principles wrapped in new age fluff that just adds to its complexity: not that I detest all things new agey (I like Yanni’s music ;) ), but the message it presents is more in line with Kevin Trudeau’s scams than practical, day-to-day advice. So I’m with you on the vomit-inducing, Clay.
A lot of people wonder what it’s like to have [INSERT NAME OF MATERIAL RICHES HERE], but once they’ve experienced that, the novelty wears off. That’s why there’s a lot of rich people who’re discontent and seeking spirituality, a simple life — whatever it is, they’ve gone through the upper-crust echelon of human-possession-hoarding and want *change*. And after they’ve had change for awhile, they’ll likely get restless and want something else.
Let’s remember what Spock said about having being less desirable than wanting, as illogical as it is. :)
journal said,
Wrote on April 19, 2008 @ 5:09 pm
Whither Productivity…
The Growing Life is a recent favorite new blog of mine. One of the things I have enjoyed in the past few weeks of checking it out is the often “alternate” takes on productivity Clay, the author, offers. He often……
Clay Collins said,
Wrote on April 19, 2008 @ 6:38 pm
@Torley: I really like the Spock quote. And I’m with you about all the materialism stuff, although I actually enjoyed much of The Secret. I just don’t believe in the “law” of attraction. And I actually found much of the audio book good, but that video just floors me. I’d much prefer to call it the “principal” of attraction, and I think it has much more to do with internal cognitive processes than quantum physics or anything external. You always have interesting and well-thought-out points to make, so I’m glad that you continue to return and share your insights.
@Cameron: I like what you say about priorities. Things like owning an outrageously expensive car might be nice, but when such goals appear on goal top 10 lists it seems to point to someone being out of touch. But that’s just my opinion. I’m glad that you like this post, Cameron, as I really enjoy your blog and am glad you stopped by.
Clay Collins said,
Wrote on April 19, 2008 @ 6:43 pm
@@Stephen: It’s always nice to see the Stephen context around here. I’ll think about doing the happiness project interview. Thanks for suggesting it.
Clay Collins said,
Wrote on April 19, 2008 @ 6:48 pm
@Evelyn: Thanks for both the love and the light.
@Adam: Thank you for this very nice comment. Yeah that gold goblin’s definately a bad one.
Rose said,
Wrote on April 20, 2008 @ 12:06 am
Thank you for that great reminder. I’ve been waring with feeling like I should be doing “something” more. Have some big goal because you’re supposed to. In turn lately I’ve just been enjoying spring, my garden and the two year old I’m staying home with… but feeling a bit guilty about it. It was a nice reminder that if you are happy and comfortable that sometimes it’s good there isn’t another big goal. Just something as simple as a large patch of dirt, a big person shovel and a little person shovel and a couple of huckleberry bushes to plant can make an awesome goal. I’ve been pruning my blog reading down a lot but yours is a keeper. Thank you.
@Stephen | Productivity in Context said,
Wrote on April 20, 2008 @ 7:06 am
>Rose: Huckleberry bushes? I wonder if I can get those in Maine?
Anyway, how’s this for abundant living: I went kayaking yesterday instead of worrying about work, or goals or anything else for that matter! So much fun!
Andrew said,
Wrote on April 20, 2008 @ 8:24 pm
A funny response to the Secret by Australian comedy show. Worth watching!
Wendi Kelly said,
Wrote on April 21, 2008 @ 7:43 am
I do believe that your mind is a very powerful tool and it shouldn’t be discounted in terms of what you think will affect your future. That being said, I want a much simpler, less stuff filled life and it is a primary goal of our family. Back to basics.
This was done in a very interesting and unique way! I liked it!
Coach Melissa Pierce said,
Wrote on April 21, 2008 @ 10:45 am
Just a little insight from a life coach here:
The Secret has brought me a lot of clients. People who are trying to apply the “Law of Attraction” and failing miserably at manifesting whatever they have set their sights on in that moment. The problem being,the Secret, in my humble opinion, is just one huge piece of propaganda that gets one’s hopes up but doesn’t include any of the fine print necessary to get the tool of LOA to work. And while I love all the clients The Secret has brought to me, I am a little miffed that so much of my time is spent re-teaching my clients how to feel good and know their own hearts - they’ve been spending so much time retraining themselves to think positively yet they have no idea how they feel about any of it.
Clay cleverly illustrated this in his post: You have to know what you truly want. If what you are asking for doesn’t move you to tears, if you can’t follow up your wants with a logical reason as to why you want it - Chances are you don’t REALLY want it, it’s just another thing you think you should want. (should - a word that is used almost exclusively as a way to solicit guilt - either from yourself or someone else)
What I’ve found most in my coaching of recovering followers of The Secret is that most of them don’t want the Mansions and Millions of dollars they thought they did - most people just want a happy human connection with others, or to find a way to live comfortably doing what they love.
Loraleigh Vance said,
Wrote on April 21, 2008 @ 1:52 pm
Right on! I second pretty much everything you’ve said here.
My reaction to the book “The Secret” when it first appeared was a loud unmitigated groan. It’s all just a repeat of books I read years ago and it still doesnt’ work until you know who you really are and what you really want in life.
Of course, one could argue that attempting to live by these philosophies might get you there, ’cause “pain is the touchstone of all our spiritual growth!”
Laurie said,
Wrote on April 21, 2008 @ 2:17 pm
Man, Clay! Was this post personally directed at me or what?? Just kidding, but it seriously struck a chord with me. This part in particular:
We make what seem to be incredible sacrifices to remove ourselves from restrictive conventional situations, and damn it, after all that sacrifice, it better result in something breathtakingly amazing. So we start setting unrealistic and ego-driven goals (as opposed to the unreasonable authentic goals that bring us alive and cause us to wreak havoc on the world in beautiful ways).
TOTALLY.
Also, several of your commenters made really astute observations about needing to really understand what you want and why you want it. I’ve been really struggling with this lately.
And you weren’t kidding about that first video being vomit-inducing! The comments alone nearly had me hurling. I think there’s definitely some truth to the idea that thinking positively brings rewards, but I think it’s because happy, confident, focused people are more likely to be well-liked and to get things done.
Travis said,
Wrote on April 21, 2008 @ 6:38 pm
Good stuff, Clay! Goals should be our friendly reminders, and not our despotic Masters. Point well made! Cheers.
Joyce Schwarz said,
Wrote on April 22, 2008 @ 1:30 am
SO CLAY — how about if I excerpt some of this for my new book “THE VISIO BOARD” Unlock the Secret to an Extraordinary Life — SERIOUSLY…I love the phrase ABUNDANCE 2.0 — wish I would have thought of it — and I’m in the high tech biz. The carbon footprint comment is priceless. Email me at: thevisionbaord@aol.com and I’ll explain more. It’s a REAL book by Harper Collins Publishing– already listed for pre-sale at Amazon.com — oh by the way do you have a VISION BOARD that shows Abundance 2.0 — we can always mock one up for you — digitally of course– no sense wasting paper right!!!!!!!!!! Joyce Schwarz
Joyce Schwarz said,
Wrote on April 22, 2008 @ 1:31 am
Yuck — late here in California — the email is: thevisionboard@aol.com and the title of the book is THE VISION BOARD — not the Visio board :)) js.
Paul Montwill | SwitchStories.com said,
Wrote on April 22, 2008 @ 9:16 am
Clay, it is so funny that people work very hard hopping they will be able to fully enjoy their lives while they can do it right now. Really weird. It is also very funny how so many people want to be famous/stars/celebrities. Why?
Rose said,
Wrote on April 22, 2008 @ 9:26 am
>Stephen: Huckleberry bushes? I wonder if I can get those in Maine? - Hmm… you might be able to but you may need to special order them. They are native to Idaho and Oregon.. not sure where else. They like well drained soil with lots of peat moss. Will work in partial shade (and thus the reason they are going in a particular spot behind my garage.) They need some water but will take a drier climate. I think they are fairly cold hardy… but I’m not sure how hardy. (I’m in Idaho.) Your biggest issue in Maine might be too much moisture.
(Ok, back to your regularly scheduled non-gardening discussions. :) )
@Stephen | Productivity in Context said,
Wrote on April 22, 2008 @ 9:41 am
Thanks Rose. I had a huckleberry bush when I lived in CT and it was so pretty. Where we live is very wooded, and I haven’t seen it in the summer yet. I do not know what I need to do to dress it up. It is pretty wet, marshy even. There are a dozen little springs on the property that run down to the creek below.
Tim Brownson said,
Wrote on April 23, 2008 @ 10:50 am
I love The Secret for one reason and one reason only. It allows me to talk to clients about stuff that was previously often off limits, such as meditation, far eastern philosophies and even positive thinking. It certainly has opened some peoples minds in that respect.
I hate it for other reasons. I have had several clients come to me and say something like this:
“My life is shit and I know it’s all my fault because I’ve seen The Secret”
That creates a problem, let me tell you.
I’ve no idea about the LOA and I have an open-mind about it. What I do know though is that there are enough holes in the rationale that the movie offres that you could drive a truck, two tanks and an aircraft carrier through it and still lean over the edge without risking banging your head on the sides.
It’s not a ‘Law’ it’s a theory and should be accpeted and be debated as such in my humble opinion.
Great post Clay!
Check this out if you like http://thomrutledge.com/secretantidote/default.asp
Tom Volkar / Delightful Work said,
Wrote on April 23, 2008 @ 8:52 pm
Clay
This is a very thought-provoking post. I especially enjoyed reading what you said about goals. “Goals should keep us anchored to our own realities. They’re tools meant to make things better, and for this reason we should also be willing to change them as frequently as necessary frequently.”
Having spent 23 years in a successful sales career I got so sick of goals and goal-setting philosophy that I don’t even use the word anymore. I have values, projects and objectives and I can change my mind about them whenever I feel like it.
I think that’s the kind of blanket permission you’re giving your readers. You sir, have a keen mind. I’m grateful to read your words.
Tim thanks a bunch for that Thom Rutledge link. That was an exceptional read.
Tom
Trixi said,
Wrote on April 24, 2008 @ 8:13 am
> Steven:
Huckleberries are in the Vaccinium family and thus are closely related to (sometimes considered one in the same with) blueberries. And we know you can have fabulous blueberries in Maine!
Usually, the distinction between them is that blueberries have numerous tiny seeds, while huckleberries have 10 larger seeds (making them more difficult to eat).
So, perhaps planting a few blueberry bushes instead of huckleberry might suit you (and your clime) better.
>Clay: great post, great blog ~ tracked you over here from Leo’s Zen Habits site, looks like I’ll now have two must-read-daily blogs on my list. :-) Keep up the great writing!
Kenneth King said,
Wrote on April 24, 2008 @ 3:10 pm
Excellent point Jonathan. I am all for simplifying things. I’m in the process of moving to a new house and have been giving or throwing away much of the accumulated stuff that tends to collect as we allow it. A simpler lifestyle leads to fewer distractions and few things to compete for our attention. When you come to a realization that you are already whole and complete, then you are right, things don’t matter as much anymore. They are nice to have, fun, and totally acceptable, but you do not need them to be happy and you no longer define yourself by them.
cj said,
Wrote on April 25, 2008 @ 10:58 am
wow, it’s like going to an AA meeting back in the 80s! People are coming out and validating my own reactions to LOA and the Secret: 1. getting a bunch of cars and jewelry ain’t what we’re trying to attract, 2. it’s a little too much to really believe each individual is “at fault” or “responsible” for everything that happens to them. If that’s true, I guess I’m at the root of vote fraud, corruption in government and waterboarding! Had no idea it was all me. I think it’s actually “a dirty little secret” that these ideas have some weak spots.
Duff said,
Wrote on April 27, 2008 @ 12:54 pm
Very well said, Clay.
I’ve been thinking a lot about optimization, as opposed to maximization, and ecology–in the context of personal development.
To optimize one’s finances, for example, one might aim to make as much money that is best for happiness, and then stop striving for more. Happiness studies have shown that this is around $36,000 for most people. More than that doesn’t correlate with increased happiness.
Too often personal development gurus advocate for maximizing one’s finances, health, relationships, etc. I used to have very few friends. After listening to too much Tony Robbins, I set a goal to have 50 friends. I got close to achieving my goal and realized that I hated having so many friends, because I couldn’t possibly maintain all those relationships.
Optimize, not maximize.
Ecology has to do with balancing all aspects of a system. What will happen to the rest of your life when you have a private jet? Or 6 girlfriends? Or a high-flying career (where you work 80 hours a week)? Is it worth it? What are the side-effects of success?
Evomend said,
Wrote on May 5, 2008 @ 10:50 pm
Warum wir alles voll stopfen…
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